The man says, "I'll show you, but only if you get me a beer."
So of course the bartender gets the man a beer. The man drinks it. He pulls out a tiny human from the box, then a tiny piano. The little man sits down and starts playing the piano with skill.
"Wow!" exclaims the bartender. "That's amazing! Where did you get him from?"
"For another beer, I'll tell you," says the man. So the bartender gets the man another beer. The man drinks it and says: "I got it from a genie."
"Really? A real genie??" says the bartender. "Do you think I could borrow him for one little wish?"
And for another beer the man agrees, but warns: "Speak loudly - he's 3,000 years old and a little deaf.”
The bartender gets the man another beer. The man drinks it and gives the bartender the lamp.
The bartender rubs the lamp and the genie pops out, looking very old. "Master, I grant you one wish. What is it?" says the tired old genie.
"I wish for a million bucks!"
All of a sudden a million ducks start flying into the room. "What the heck is this?!? I wished for a million bucks not a million ducks!" shouts the bartender in anger.
It's My Birthday, I'll Have a Drink If I Want To (Funny)
An old lady is celebrating her 80th birthday aboard a cruise ship. The bartender buys her a drink, and she proceeds to have a few...
Great Joke: Three Dinosaurs and Their Three Wishes
This joke begins millions of years ago, as 3 dinosaurs find a magic lamp...
Great Joke: The Bartender and His Very Low Prices
This joke begins with a man getting much cheaper drinks than he anticipated...
Joke: I Bet You I Can Reach That Glass!
A man and bets a barman that he's able to urinate in a glass located on the far side of his bar. The barman agrees, but doesn't know what else is going on...
Vandalism Is Not Okay. Unless It Makes You Laugh Out Loud
Vandalism is WRONG. Unless it makes you laugh out loud. Then it’s okay.
Hilarious: The Young vs. The Old on a Date!
Dating when you're 20 versus when you're middle-aged is similar, but also completely different...
Hilarious: 15 Embarrassingly Funny Autocorrect Disasters
Autocorrect fails can be ridiculously funny sometimes.
Laugh Out Loud with Rob Spence's Crazy Balloon Act
Watch in awe as Rob Spence's balloon mime act takes center stage, bringing non-stop laughter.
Have You Ever Wondered What Animals Look Like Pregnant?
These animals really don't look too pleased with the current state that they're in! Here's what 22 animals look like just before they give birth.
These Guys Have Some WEIRD Choices in Christmas Sweaters!
Some people just have bizarre tastes when it comes to Christmas sweaters.
Hilarious These Silly Signs Made Me Laugh!
19 funny signs that were written on purpose to be hilarious and witty.
17 Hilarious Animal Memes That Will Have You Guffawing
Start your day with these ridiculously hilarious animal memes.
Classic Comedy: Mr. Bean at the Library.
Another classic scene from the silent comedian who manages to make me laugh more than a dozen talking stand up artists.
The Famous Sketch that Made Millions Laugh!
Monty Python performed loads of hilarious sketches, but only this one gets me out of my chair and secretly practicing my own silly walks!
Hilarious: 19 Times the Universe Decided to Be Ironic...
These photos capture the most brilliant comedic irony caught on camera!
Simon's Cat Leaves His Owner Out in the Cold!
Watch this latest Christmas Special episode of Simon's Cat.
These Comic Strips Are So Funny, You'll Ask for More!
Check out these hilarious one-frame funnies by artist Tyson Cole.
15 Hilarious Photos Taken a Second Before Disaster
A series of photos happening just before disaster strikes.
Hilarity Ensues When This Ventriloquist Takes the Stage
Watch ventriloquist Jack Williams deliver an incredible audition in America's Got Talent with his puppet!
These Photos Could Only Have Been Taken In China...
China is a unique country full of unique characters, and this picture series proves it!
Hilarious! The Joys of Motherhood - As Animals See Them
Motherhood may sound like a good idea, but it really takes it out of you, as these dog and cat mothers can hilariously testify.
Animals Bring So Much Joy Into Our Lives - & Make Us Laugh
There's no doubt that animals bring great joy to many people, not least by making them laugh. Take a look at these 15 funny animals doing their thing.
The Wit and Humor of Groucho Marx – Funny Compilation
Sit back and enjoy this hilarious compilation of the funniest Groucho Marx insults and one-liners.
Adorable: Before and After Photos of Pets Getting a Bath!
Take a look at these lovely pets, then wake them wet with one click of a mouse. The look on their freshly washed faces is absolutely priceless.
18 Hilariously Weird Signs We Just Had to Share
Warning signs aren’t supposed to be funny, right?
Hilarious! This Is How Old Men Strip a Kitchen
The Swedes are known for some great cooking. But it seems it's not the men who deserve the praise. This is what they really get up to in the kitchen!
13 Funny Palindromes That Will Make You Giggle
People have been enjoying palindromes for centuries - here are 13 funny examples that are sure to make crack you up.
These Funny Signs Made Me Holler!
Feeling sad or bored? After reading these 12 side-splitting signs, you will no longer have those two problems on your hands.
HILARIOUS: Some People Have Unusual Solutions
Ingenious solutions to ordinary problems that will make you laugh.
Hilarious: A Most Unusual Sermon!
Rowan Atkinson, the famous comedian, gives a sermon the likes of which you've never heard...
With These Witty Lines Anyome Can be Star of the Party
some funny sayings with a something for everyone.
Hilarious: 15 Who Parked Terribly and Found Karma
Some people just don't know how to park a care, and some are just incredibly selfish. Here are the worst offenders.
14 Crazy Things That Could Only Happen in One Country...
14 photos of things that you could only find in Russia. These will bring a smile to your face.
Comedy Gold: Enjoy This Rib-Tickling Laurel & Hardy Clip
Enjoy this hilarious clip from a Laurel and Hardy short titled ‘The Snow Hawk’.
These Cats and Dogs Cause Complete Christmas Carnage!
You dog or cat might be the world's most innocent creature for most of the year, but as soon as the holiday season comes around all this changes in a heartbeat.
Alaska Has Some Sights No Other Place Has...
Alaska is a special kind of place. Here are some hilarious photos that will prove to you - you're in Alaska, buddy! See for yourself.
Working With a Feline - A Cat-astrophy...
Cats are cute, but try working with one of them around...
HILARIOUS: The Very Best of Classic Blonde Jokes!
Blondes aren't stupid, but these classic blonde jokes are still really funny.
For a Giant Smile, Check Out These Hilarious Cartoons!
If you love cartoon stripes then you came to the right place. Enjoy this collection of funny cartoons that are sure to make your day funnier and your step lighter.
Hilarious: Old Ladies Know How to Ask the Best Questions...
Old ladies have some of the most poignant and relevant questions to ask of any of us. Here are a few of them!