84 Funny Pick Up Lines!

Some of the best lines in the world were pick up lines first! After all, there's nothing that makes guys funnier than the prospect of making a woman laugh. And of course, we also have pick up lines for women coming up next...

You know what’s on the menu? ME-N-U
Are you a bank loan? Because you got my interest!
What has 36 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.
Did you get your license suspended for driving so many guys crazy?
Are you a cat because I'm feline a connection between us.
My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow?
Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only 10 I see!
I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together.
How much does a polar bear weight? Enough to break the ice!
If I were a transplant surgeon, I’d give you my heart.
Your hand looks heavy. Here, let me hold it for you.
Do you like vegetables because I love you from my head tomatoes.
I'm having a sale in my bedroom. My clothes are 100% off.
If I told you I worked at Home Depot, would you let me handle your tool?
Are you a burger? Because you can be the meat between my buns.
Do you like sales? Because if you're looking for a good one, clothing is 100% off at my place.
If you were a vegetable you'd be a cutecumber.
I'm learning about important dates in history. Wanna be in one of them?
Did you invent the airplane? Because you seem Wright for me!
(While she’s leaving) "Hey, aren’t you forgetting something?"
Girl: "What?"
"Me."
Roses are red, my face is too.. that only happens when I see you.
Your shirt has to go, but you can stay.
My magical watch says you aren’t wearing any panties. Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast!
Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants!
Are you cake? Cause I want a piece of that.
My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.
Is your body from McDonald's? Cause I'm lovin' it!
I wish I were cross-eyed so I can see you twice
Have you been to the doctor's lately? Cause I think you're lacking some vitamin me.
Are you the online order I placed a few days ago? Cause I’ve been waiting for you all day.
I want your flesh rocket in my hot pocket.
I'm not wearing any socks. And I have the panties to match.
If you were words on a page, you’d be fine print.
Your name must be Coca Cola, because you're so-da-licious.
If I had a dollar for every time I thought of you, I’d be in a higher tax bracket.
(Pick up a sugar packet off the floor) Uh, miss? I think you dropped your name tag.
I know I’m a perfect stranger, so let me introduce myself. I’m Ted. See? Now I’m just perfect.
Love is a sensation, caused by a temptation, to feel penetration, a guy sticks his location in a girl’s destination, to increase the population for the next generation. Did you get my explanation, or do you need a demonstration?
Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?
Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you?
My doctor told me I have a Vitamin D deficiency. Wanna go back to my place and save me?
In my nursing class we just learned how to bathe people... can I practice on you?
You must be a ninja, because you snuck into my heart
Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koala-fications.
If I had a garden I’d put your tulips and my tulips together
I thought Happiness starts with H. But why does mine starts with U.
You're like a dictionary... you add meaning to my life.
Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk past again?
Good thing I just bought term life insurance … because I saw you and my heart stopped!
Can I tie your shoes? I don’t want you falling for anyone else.
Please keep your distance. I might fall for you.
Excuse me, would you like a raisin? No? How about a date then?
These voices in my head have been telling me to come over here and talk to you.
Are you a pulmonary embolism? Because you take my breath away.
Hey Girl! Are you a software program?
Because you've been running in my memory all day.
Roses are red, potatoes are brown; you are my favorite spud in the whole town!
Are you a tower? Because eiffel for you!
Sorry, but you owe me a drink. Why? Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.
You spend so much time in my mind, I should charge you rent.
Are you a beaver? Beause daaaaaaaaam!
Life without you is like a broken pencil... pointless.
Thank god I'm wearing gloves because you are too hot to handle.
On a scale from 1 to 10, you're a 9... And I'm the 1 you need.
Are you from Starbucks because I like you a latte!
Are you a banana because I find you a peeling.
What's your name? Because I'll be screaming it all night long.
Do you like science because I've got my ion you.
Are you my appendix? Because I don't understand how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.
Are you a keyboard ? Because you are my type.
If you were a Transformer you'd be Optimus Fine!
Girl, if you were a dinosaur, you'd be a Gorgeousaurus.
Can i give you a kiss? If you don’t like it, you can return it.
I know you're busy today, but can you add me to your to-do list?
Is your name Google? Because you've got everything I'm searching for.
Do you know how to drive stick? Because I sure as hell do.
Is your name Wi-fi? Because I'm really feeling a connection.
Do you have a tan, or do you always look this hot?
Can I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.
If you were a fruit you'd be a fineapple.
Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.
My mom thinks I'm gay, can you help me prove her wrong?
Can I take a picture of you so Santa knows what I want for Christmas?
Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?
My friend over there really wants your number so he knows where to get a hold of me in the morning.
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