My dads astronaut friend ate pizza in space
He said it was out of this world.
Do you know what is the favorite key of the astronauts?
The Spacebar.
Why does NASA give astronauts pencils to use in space?
Because they've got the Write Stuff.
What spread do astronauts use on their toast?
. . . Space jam
What is an astronaut's favorite candy bar?
Milky way.
I could have been an astronaut...
but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
Why don't pets make good astronauts?
They're afraid of the spay station
Why do all kids want to be an astronaut?
Because there is no pressure.
How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket.
Why do astronauts use linux?
because you can't open windows in space.
Astronaut 1: I can't find any milk for my coffee.
Astronaut 2: In space, no one can. Here, use cream.
What would’ve happen if the Apollo astronauts stayed on the lunar surface for too long?
They would’ve been lunatics.
How do astronauts prepare for a birthday party
They planet.
SpaceX is launching astronauts today with a new space catapult
Bringing forth a new era of crude spaceflight.
Why did the cosmonaut take his dog to the vet?
He came down with a stellar case of lunar tics.
Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped in gum?
He got stuck in Orbit.
Where do astronauts go for lunch?
Apollo Loco.
Dud you know Astronauts said steaks are better in space?
They're a little meteor.
Where do Astronauts go to the bathroom?
Where no one has gone before.
What is an astronauts favourite type of shirt?
Apollo
What do you do when your friend is a claustrophobic astronaut?
You give him a little space.
An astronaut broke up with his girlfriend
Apparently he didn't love her to the moon and back.
What do you say to an astronaut looking for a car park
There's a spaceman.
When should astronauts retire?
When they start spacing out.
What currency do astronauts use in space?
Starbucks.
How did the astronaut die?
exposure to Mercury.
How do astronauts cook their meals?
With a Space Heater!
What are Astronauts doing when they do a mistake?
They Apollogize