Why did the skeleton start a fight?
He had a bone to pick.
Where do skeletons go hang out at night?
Anywhere, as long as it's a hip joint.
What did one skeleton wrestler say to the other?
You better watch out for my special move. It will verta-break your back!
How do you greet a skeleton in france?
"Bonejour."
Where do you learn about bones?
Osteoclasst.
Did you hear about the skeleton that was almost picked apart by a group of wild dogs?
He marrowly escaped.
Why was the skeleton stupid?
He was a numskull.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts.
"No body won the skeleton race."
Why are skeletons such bad liars?
Everyone can see right through them.
Why did the skeleton cross the road?
To get to the body shop.
What’s the coolest part of a skeleton?
The hip.
Why didn’t one skeleton want to look at the other skeleton?
He didn’t have the stomach for it.
How do skeleton’s get their mail delivered?
By the bony express.
Why did the skeleton go to church?
Because it didn’t have any organs.
Why can’t a group of skeletons ever get anything done?
It’s a skeleton crew.
What does a skeleton play in a band?
A Trom-Bone.
My cranium is empty. I'm running bone-dry here.
"Laughing 'til I'm coffin."
What do you call a skeleton's favorite singer?
Pelvis Presley.
"Bugs and hisses."
Why couldn’t the skeleton get out of bed?
He was bone tired.
Why do skeletons get sick on windy days?
It goes right through them.
What do you call a funny bone?
A humerus.
Why does the skeleton wear skinny jeans?
Because it’s got a marrow waistline.
What is a 2000 pound skeleton called
A skeleTon.
I need to stop being such a numbskull.
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
What did the osteopathic medicine doctor bring to the potluck?
Spare ribs.
Why are bones so calm?
Nothing gets under their skin.
No body has ever won a skeleton race.
Why couldn't the skeleton get a date to the dance?
He doesn't have the heart to ask anyone out.
"Do you play the trom-bone?"
What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument?
The xylobone.
My favourite jokes are skeleton puns
Why? I find them humorous.
What did the doctor tell the skeleton who wanted to donate his body to science?
Spine on the dotted line.
How do a group of skeletons drive to work?
In the carpal lane.
"Bone to be wild."
"You can't skele-run from my skele-puns."
Where do you imprison a naughty skeleton?
A rib cage.
Why did the skeleton go to the daycare?
To get his Kidneys.
"Let's have some skele-fun."
Why can’t a legless skeleton win an argument?
They don’t have a leg to stand on.
"I would make a skeleton joke, but you wouldn't find it very
humerus."
What do you say when you go to a dinner with a bunch of osteopathologists?
Bone appetit!
"Lazy bones."
What is a skeletons favorite meal?
Anything with Ribs.
What is a skeleton’s favorite plant?
A bone-zai tree.
Why does a skeleton always tell the truth?
He wants tibia honest.
How do two skeletons have se*?
They bone each other.