Is that a discharge in your underwear, or are you just happy to see me?
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
How hot does your gas oven get?
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
You're like the neighbors' WiFi. Everyone wants to use you.
You smell. We should go take a shower together.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
Just like I never play with poop, I promise you that I will never play with your heart.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
Are you crippling depression and anxiety? Because you haunt me at every waking hour.
You looking at me is making me turn as red as that roasted beet salad.
My love for you is like cancer, it just keeps growing and growing.
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
I dreamt about you. You died.
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
Are you a durian? Because you're a total snack, but you smell like rotting flesh.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
You look a lot like my next victim.
Pies aren't the new cupcakes, baby. You are.
I'd drink your bathwater.
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
Damn! You're almost as hot as my sister/brother.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
Excuse me, I just farted over there. Can I stand here with you?
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
You smell just like my mom, want to grab a drink?
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
Just call me your baby, cause I wanna be inside you for the next 9 months.