What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
Why is Pegasus so smart?
He’s all kno-wing.
What did the guard say to stop the horse from escaping?
Halt-her!
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
What do you call a horse on a boat attached to land?
Docked.
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
What do ponies look for in a vehicle?
Lots of horsepower.
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
How did the horse get up the stairs?
He mounted them.
Why was the pony so excited to be invited to a rally with the president?
It was a huge end-horse-ment.
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
How do mares keep track of their boyfriends?
A stud book.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
What did the horse reply when asked if it can jump 3 feet?
“I lope so!”
How does a horse make paper mâché?
With newspaper clip-clop-pings.
How did the ponies stay in touch?
C-horse-pondence.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
What would a winged horse put in the bathtub?
A pegaLush bath bomb.
Why did they stop giving the horse grass?
They wanted it to be less green.
How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field?
They horse-boo.
How did the horse solve a murder?
Compiled newspaper clippings.
What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses?
Bronchitis.
Black Beauty - Now there's a dark horse.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
How does a horse get a suit fitted?
With a tail-or.
How does a horse drink wine?
With a de-canter.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
Why did the horse never get cold?
It was a Dutch warmblood.
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What do you call an explosive horse?
Neigh-palm.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
What cartoon do horses like to watch?
Whinny the Pooh.
What do horses eat with their salad? Dressage-ing.
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
Where do horses go to the bathroom?
The bathroom stall-ion.
Why didn’t the horse tell her friend she was a thief?
She didn’t want to saddle her with that information.