“Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”
― Anthony Bourdain
“Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.”
― Unknown
"Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is."
— P. J. O'Rourke
“My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.”
― Henny Youngman
"Your diet is a bank account. Good food choices are good investments."
— Bethenny Frankel
“Red meat is not bad for you. Now, blue-green meat—that’s bad for you!”
— Tom Smothers
“Being a couch potato is dangerous, someone may get hungry and eat you!”
― Unknown
“I believe it’s a cook’s moral obligation to add more butter given the chance.”
― Michael Ruhlman
"I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food."
— W.C. Fields
"Never eat more than you can lift."
— Miss Piggy
“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart.”
― Erma Bombeck
"Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face."
— Enrico Caruso
"I'm not sure what makes pepperoni so good if it's the pepper or the oni."
— Ulrik Stephens
“The key to my heart looks a whole lot like a plate of pasta.”
― Unknown
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz
"Fettucini alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults."
– Mitch Hedberg
"I just want someone to look at me the way I look at food."
— Unknown
"A slice of pie without cheese is like a kiss without a squeeze."
— Stephen King
"At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom."
— George Carlin
"I don't eat lobsters, shrimp, or crawfish because I don't eat anything that looks like I should step on it."
— George Carlin
“A party without a cake is really just a meeting.”
― Julia Child
“Every day is National Donut Day if you put your mind to it.”
― Unknown
"The trouble with eating Italian food is that, five or six days later, you're hungry again."
– George Miller
“Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.”
― Andrew W.K.
“Love means never having to say “Should we get dessert?”
― Unknown
“I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous.”
― Unknown
"Life is too short for self-hatred and celery sticks."
– Marilyn Wann
“You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not pizza.”
― Unknown
“I want to tell you about the "sausage principle." The theory says, "If you love something, never try to find out how it is done."”
― Unknown
"Without ice cream, there would be darkness and chaos."
– Don Kardong
“I have a passion for not cooking.”
― Unknown
“All my life I thought air was free until I bought a bag of chips.”
― Unknown
“A cookie a day keeps the sadness away. An entire jar of cookies a day brings it back.”
― Unknown
"When we put vegetables up for the winter, we use jars, but we call it canning. I find that jarring. And uncanny."
– Greg Tamblyn
"Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first."
– Ernestine Ulmer
"Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."
— Mark Twain
“I eat cake every day because somewhere out there it’s someone’s birthday and I like to celebrate.”
― Unknown
“Where there is cake, there is hope. And there is always cake.”
― Dean Koontz
“The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.”
— John Walters
"Carbs are the answer. No matter the question."
— Unknown
“There’s no “we” in ice cream.”
― Unknown
“Abs are temporary. Chocolate is forever.”
― Unknown
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap."
— Kevin James
"If I hold a can of soda up to my ear and listen carefully, I can hear my bones pleading for a glass of milk."
– Bridger Winegar
"When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight."
— Yogi Berra
"You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans."
— Ronald Reagan
“I’m like Pacman when I’m at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me.”
― Unknown
"An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh."
— Will Rogers
"If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world."
– J.R.R. Tolkien
"Promises and pie-crust are made to be broken."
— Jonathan Swift