Never date a Theater person...
... wayyy too much Drama...
A friend has joined a blonds only theatre group. Fair play to him.
I keep looking at our upstage platform that is designed with only a ladder for access. It's just so hard not to stair.
Theater sound guys aren't always good speakers
I wonder why theatres are so sad? They're always dark, moody, and in tiers.
I had a job directing an elementary school theater production.
It wasn't hard work, after all, it was child's play.
Show your popcorn and coke guy at the movies a little appreciation. After all, he makes a lot of concessions.
Why the skeleton doesn't go to the theater?
Because he has nobody to go with.
You know why theater people say "break a leg" instead of good luck?
Because if you do, you'll end up in a cast!
An actor arrived for his rehearsal at the theatre.
As he looked around, an incredible feeling of deja vu swept over him.
Suddenly he realised the set seemed like a weird adaption of his apartment, the actress looked like an odd version of his wife, and the director sounded like an eerie rendition of his dad.
"Uncanny!" He thought. "I've arrived at a strange stage of my life".
We should've guessed the failed postman wouldn't be any better at delivering his acting lines.
My friend told me he had to leave the play after Act l. Knowing he'd waited forever to see it, I asked him why. He said the program stated that Act ll was two years later, and he refused to wait that long.
My theater group is writing a sci-fi thriller about classical musicians.
I'll be Bach.
Why do poltergeists love haunting old theaters?
Because they can't wait to boo the performers.
I went to a theater performance done on a bunch of dictionaries the other day...
It was a play on words.
What did the thief steal on the theatre's opening night? The spotlight.
I seem to find a way of sneaking chocolate into movie theaters..
.. I always have a few twix up my sleeve.
Friend of mine got sacked as a set designer for not producing anything. He didn't make a scene.
When the theatre owner dies, his visitation hours are as follows: 1pm, 3pm, 6:30 pm, 9pm, and midnight.
Who are the biggest fans at the theatre? The backstage crew - They're always giving props to the actors.
A classically trainer theater performer just became a spy.
I guess you could say they perform... thespionage
Why did the Lord of the Rings author get kicked out of the movie theatre.
He was Tolkien all the way through.
The ghost scared all the boys who ventured into the haunted house and then varnished into the almirah!
Tried acting in a theatre full of farmers. Got mooed off stage.
Thankfully, not too many thieves are interested in acting on stage. They'd surely steal the show.
My grandfather warned people that the Titanic would sink
*No one listened, but he kept on warning them nonetheless until they got sick of him and kicked him out of the movie theatre*
There are two people who both claim to live in the building where Shakespeare wrote Romeo & Juliet. They should put a plaque on both their houses.
Don't theater jokes always seem so staged?
It may just be a stage I'm going through, but I sure do love the trapdoors on set.
Everyone was spot on, you really did make a great theatre lighting tech.
Theatre costumes must be handled with care since they're often laced with something.