"Bugs and hisses."
What do you call a skeleton who lies?
A phoney-ba-boney.
Why does a skeleton always tell the truth?
He wants tibia honest.
What do you call a skeleton's favorite singer?
Pelvis Presley.
What’s the coolest part of a skeleton?
The hip.
"Some people have no guts."
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts.
Why do skeletons get sick on windy days?
It goes right through them.
What do you call a funny bone?
A humerus.
Did you hear about the skeleton that was almost picked apart by a group of wild dogs?
He marrowly escaped.
Why aren’t skeletons good at poker?
You can see right through them.
Where do skeletons go hang out at night?
Anywhere, as long as it's a hip joint.
"Dying to have fun."
How do two skeletons have se*?
They bone each other.
What do skeletons put in their photocopiers?
Skeletoner
"Laughing 'til I'm coffin."
Why didn’t one skeleton want to look at the other skeleton?
He didn’t have the stomach for it.
Why does the skeleton wear skinny jeans?
Because it’s got a marrow waistline.
"Bone to be wild."
Why couldn't the skeleton get a date to the dance?
He doesn't have the heart to ask anyone out.
"You can't skele-run from my skele-puns."
What do you say when you go to a dinner with a bunch of osteopathologists?
Bone appetit!
What is a skeleton’s favorite plant?
A bone-zai tree.
What is a skeletons favorite meal?
Anything with Ribs.
"Do you play the trom-bone?"
What did the doctor tell the skeleton who wanted to donate his body to science?
Spine on the dotted line.
What did the osteopathic medicine doctor bring to the potluck?
Spare ribs.
"No body won the skeleton race."
How do you know if a spine finds you funny?
It starts cracking up.
What’s a skeletons favorite wrestling event?
A rib cage match.
Why did the skeleton go to church?
Because it didn’t have any organs.
"Let's have some skele-fun."
"I would make a skeleton joke, but you wouldn't find it very
humerus."