What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.