There was this knight who would be always roasting whatever he would catch for food. Guess this is why he was known as the Bonfire Knight.
Digging trenches during the middle ages was seen as a great honor because it showed someone's shovelry!
If Hamlet was alive now, he would have only worn t-shirts saying 2B or not 2B!
Why was the knight fighting the tournament with a sword made from cheddar cheese? Because the cheese was extra sharp!
Once, a wizard had cursed a knight and turned him into a bird. To express his sorrow, he sang throughout the entire day because he had become a knightingle.
What did the bone mage use to rob medieval homes?
A skeleton key
How do medieval cathedrals clean their mouths before bedtime?
They gargoyle
What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
"Over my dead body!"
What do you call a gathering of Arthur's Knights?
A Sir conference
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
The one time of the day when knights are willing to work is during the knightshift.
What was the nickname for the knight who ruled the fort?
"Fortnite"
What is the name of the device that the king uses to control the moat around his castle? A remoat control.
What do you call a stunt rider from the 1200's?
Medieval Knievel
What was the name of the knight who made the round table of Sir Arthur perfect? He was a knight called Sir Cle.
My sister once took a knight as a dance partner to her high-school party because it was a prom knight.
Which knight is the protector of foods?
Sir Anwrap
Most of the knights of the round table of King Arthur were in their middle ages.
What do you call a Korean knight who is looking for his lost belongings? He goes by the name Sir Ching!
Why did the king order his new castle be built in the evening?
For the night knights!
Medieval Kings and Queens were carried by their soldiers and servants. I am not lying, they litter-ally carried that way!
Knights have always used one type of lamp since medieval times. These lamps are now called Knight Lamps.
I like my pasta the way I like my medieval Italian literature.
All Dante.
Santa hit a dragon and killed it whilst flying over medieval England...
... guess you could say he sleighed it
Why did Arthur have a round table?
So nobody could corner him!
What do you call a medieval horse in the army
A knight-mare
Why couldn't Vivaldi play medieval music?
Because his violin was Baroque
Who was the knight that was very secretive?
Sir Reptitious
I killed all the knights in the Iron Keep, except one,
He was Allone
The medieval queen was unhappy when she saw that it was pouring outside. She sighed to herself, "This could be another reigny day."
If you go to Medieval Times and watch the jousts, there is a sir charge.
Vincent Van Gogh met a knight during the latter part of his life, who inspired him to draw one of his most famous paintings - The Starry Knight.
I like my wine like I like my medieval cities.
Fortified.
Medieval scientists were known to be very arrogant and stubborn. They thought that everything revolved around them!
What did Medieval postmen wear?
Chain mail.
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight?
Sir Render
I accidentally sat on a medieval stained glass window at the antique store...
That was a royal pane in the ass.
In the medieval ages, many knights had to travel throughout day and night. In order to increase their visibility in darkness, they invented a device known as the knightvision goggles.
It was quite dangerous for messengers back in the medieval era.
They often had to wear mail armor.
How did murderers hide the body in medieval times?
They start by dragon it.
Why are automatic doors like knights?
Because they're chivalrous!
Why do medieval ghosts refuse to stop at McDonald's?
They prefer Wight Castle.
Did you hear about the medieval kinghunter?
He excelled in throne weapons
Why did the medieval Indian go to the doctor?
He was feeling a bit Sikh
Why was the medieval knight polishing his dress before going for the Queens's dinner party? Because he wanted to have a night in shining armor!
I would say that life for the majority of people in the middle ages was rather peasant.
There were two knights who were fighting a long duel with each other. The fight ended when one of them chopped off the other's leg- guess the knight was defeeted.
Where does a Knights templar keep his valuables?
A deus vult