What did the goat say when he woke up on a train?
I have no idea how I goat here.
Did you hear about the mother goat telling jokes?
She’s a real kidder.
For goat’s sake, that’s enough.
What did the little goats say when they were caught playing a prank on the sheep?
Sorry, we were just kidding.
What did the baby goat say to his father?
I kid you not.
Is a goat that eats office supplies on a staple diet?
Who called it a goat petting zoo...
and not Close Encounters of the Herd Kind?
Who did the goats vote for as president?
Billy Clinton.
How do you keep a goat from charging?
You take his credit card away!
What do you call a royal goat wearing denim?
Billy Jean King.
A goat came out of nowhere and headbutted me
It was a ram-done act of violence
What did the goat farmer’s wife say to her husband when he was swearing on the job?
“Not in front of the kids!”
Did you hear the joke about the lumberjack, The sheep and the goat?
I wood tell ewe, but it’s a baaaaaad joke
I goat this.
What do you call a Spanish goat with no hind legs?
Gracias.
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.
How long has this been going on?
Since I was a kid.
What’s a goat’s favorite TV show?
America’s Goat Talent.
Two goats are married, living on a farm. Billy Goat says, "I really want children. Let's make some babies."
Betty Goat responds, "Heck no. No baby goats for me..."
"I'm not kidding."
Goat milk?
Why was the farmer angry?
Because someone got his goat.
What’s the definition of butter?
An angry goat.
You have goat to be kidding me.
What do you call a lazy goat?
Billy Idle.
What’s a goat’s favorite drink?
Goat-arade.
Why did the ram run over the cliff edge?
Because he didn’t see the ewe turn.
Why are goats and rhinos attracted to each other?
Because they are both horny animals.
Do hairless goats wish they had mohair?
When milking a nervous goat, you should use kid gloves.
What do you call a goat who paints pictures?
Vincent Van Goat.
What do you call a goat who is in charge of a university?
Billy Dean.
Whatever floats your goat.
What do goats eat?
Goatmeal.
Why is it hard to carry on a conversation with a goat?
Because they are always butting in.
What’s a goat’s favorite musical?
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dream Goat.
If a goat grows a beard, is it a goatee?
Why are goats from France musical?
Because they have French horns.
Did you hear about the owl who married a goat?
The had a hootenanny.
I just got an adorable baby goat, but it can’t bend its legs.
The vet said it’s a cute kid knee disorder.
If a young goat learns a martial art, are they a karate kid?
What do you call an outlaw goat?
Billy the Kid.
Is a mountain goat a hillbilly?
What do you call a Spanish Goat with no hind legs?
Gracias
What does a goat call his girlfriend?
Bae.
What kind of music do goats listen to?
Baaa-ch!
Something’s goat to give.
Young goats should be careful when they're out and and about and shouldn't jump into a stranger's car.
That's how you get kidnapped.
What's a goat's favorite organ?
A Kid-ney
What do you call a goat that lip-syncs?
Billy Vanilli.
What symbolizes a goat’s family tree?
A goat of arms.
What do you call a goat swimming in the sea?
Billy Ocean.