What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.